Google is Causing the Downfall of...Google

The CEOs of Google and Microsoft are locked in a dance, though only one of them seems to have taken their dancing lessons seriously.

Microsoft's Satya Nadella may have pulled the rug from underneath Google's Sundar Pichai by investing in a promising artificial intelligence startup early and integrating the resulting product (ChatGPT) with its search-engine Bing, but his winning streak doesn't seem to end there, because now, Google is causing the downfall of.. Google.

Having declared the launch of ChatGPT as a "code red" event that threatened the company's survival, Google engineers were hard at work to create their own version of the popular chatbot that could compete with ChatGPT. Hyping its release, Google finally gave the world at large the first glimpse of its chatbot Bard this past week, and.. it was bad. Really bad.

Far from the finesse ChatGPT has demonstrated so far, Google's Bard not only fumbled but caused a panic in investors, wiping $100 billion in Google-parent Alphabet's market value the day it was launched.

Journalists were quick to point out that Bard responded incorrectly to a question in its promotional showcase, giving analysts the cannon fodder they needed to pounce on the company for being woefully slow to react to Microsoft's success.

As it stands, Bard needs a lot more work before it can come even close to ChatGPT's capabilities, and Google knows as much. "We'll combine external feedback with our own internal testing to make sure Bard's responses meet a high bar for quality, safety and groundedness in real-world information," a Google spokesperson was quoted as saying following the disastrous launch of Bard.

No ETA on when Google will integrate Bard into its own search engine.

Google ranked #3 in this week's Tech Company Rankings. Its parent Alphabet was ranking in the #50 spot while its competitor Microsoft was trending in the #76 spot.

Bob Iger's Return Makes Disney a Little Less Magical ⛈️

Unconfirmed reports say that Elsa is having a hard time letting it go this past week after Disney announced thousands of layoffs just months after it roped Bob Iger out of retirement.

Nobody expected to see Iger back at the helm of Disney, but so unhappy was the Disney board with his predecessor's work (who was handpicked by Iger and shared his first name), that it decided it wanted the familiar comfort of Bob version 1.0 as opposed to Bob version 1.1.

"Disney and its incomparable brands and franchises hold a special place in the hearts of so many people around the globe—most especially in the hearts of our employees, whose dedication to this company and its mission is an inspiration," Iger had said in November, when he returned to the company as its CEO.

Sadly, employees' dedication did not stop Disney from announcing 7,000 job cuts as part of the company's plan to improve profitability. The changes seem to have come, in part, because of pressure from a so-called activist investor who was looking to upend the Disney board, Game of Thrones style. Now that Disney has reorganized, the investor is __no longer interested __in a board seat and is seemingly content with the gains on his investment.

Zuck is About to Get a Whole Lot (More) Unpopular💩

.. at least within Meta offices.

According to media reports, Meta — the owner of Facebook, Whatsapp, and Instagram (among others) — is planning another round of layoffs around March as part of CEO Mark Zuckerberg's vision to simplify organization structure and become more efficient as a whole. The layoffs would be on top of the 11,000 Meta fired last year.

Meanwhile, a separate report has highlighted how Amazon is clawing away at Facebook's digital ads business. Either way, Meta is either going to exist a decade from now, or become the next Yahoo!

Facebook ranked #20, Meta was at #83, Instagram was #1, and Amazon was trending on the #33 spot.

In Other News.. 📰

• ChatGPT has been jailbroken. Also, the chatbot is in high demand in China.
• Layoffs are bad, right? Well.. not for big agricultural and construction equipment manufacturers looking to modernize themselves.
• A new HackerNoon report looks at the direction tech giants are taking to survive during the onslaught of a possible recession.
• Uber went up. Lyft went down.

And that's a wrap! Don't forget to share this newsletter with your family and friends!

See y'all next week. PEACE! ☮️